If inside a video game and confronted with a mob of religious fanatics?
You would:
A) Torch them
B) Throw grenades and run for it
C) Stand on the highest object in proximity and proclaim yourself the new savior
D) Take out your shotgun
E) Rant some random biblical passages backwards while foaming at the mouth and looking demoniacal
F) Look around for a chainsaw to fire up
G) Think you are bad@ss and use your trusty knife
H) (something else)
H) Make eye contact serenely with at least a few of the zealots. Then proceed to sit lotus-style on the ground, close my eyes, and begin saying every demon’s name I can come up with from memory, interspersed with Latin (e.g. “Bealzebub caveat emptor Nicademus lorum ipsum Succorbenoth et tu Philatanus e pluribus unum…”).
Then snap my eyes open, start gesturing frantically and drool profusely, and then if possible vomit and show only the whites of my eyes to the mob. Then take up as imposing and deep and Linda-Blair-in-Exorcist-like voice I can and say to the crowd, “YOUR JESUS WAS DELICIOUS. WHO SHALL NEXT BE CONSUMED BY MINE DARK FIRES AND ADORN MY BOWELS?”
I’d flip my eyes to normal, make eye contact as before, and smile evilly. Then, I would put my hands neatly behind my back, and start walking… one… step… after… another… towards… them… relentlessly.
And hope that I can make it to my car so I can then start it up and GTFO!
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